Updated: Jun 3, 2021
How much consideration do you give to what goes into your body and how it got there? In today’s episode, Kristen Joy (@VoluptuousLife) shares with us her journey of getting back into balance with nature, self-healing, self-discovery, and self-advocacy through nutrition.
1:00 - Getting back into balance with the animal kingdom
3:30 - The segregation of Earthlings
7:00 - The power of nutrition
15:00 - Cleaning up our act
21:30 - Finding our balance
24:00 - What’s right for YOU?
25:50 - When confrontation doesn’t go as expected
29:00 - Planting the seed as teacher/student
30:00 - Be your own health advocate
38:30 - A magical, perfect world
41:40 - A little miracle
Adrienne MacIain 0:01
Hello gorgeous creatures. I am Adrienne MacIain. This is That's Aloud, and today we have the gorgeous and amazing and wonderful Kristen Joy. Please introduce yourself.
Kristen Joy 0:14
Can you hear that? How much I'm blushing? Ah, that was sweet. Yes, I'm Kristen Joy. I am the creator of Voluptuous Life, which is all about helping women to step into their power at a body, heart, mind and spirit level.
Adrienne MacIain 0:33
Yeah, we've got to get holistic on this, right? You got to attack it from all angles.
Kristen Joy 0:39
Yes you do.
Adrienne MacIain 0:40
Or rather improve it.
Kristen Joy 0:41
Yes, okay, that's more gentle language. I was like, yes, attack!!
Adrienne MacIain 0:48
Let's embrace it from all levels. Just *kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss*
Kristen Joy 0:51
There we go!
Adrienne MacIain 0:54
Alright, so I'll start with my first question, which is, what story is the world not getting?
Kristen Joy 1:03
So I've been thinking a lot about this. And it is something that I feel like is more relevant, or has become more prevalent in my consciousness, I should say. And I think it's about... We live in a time right now that I think there's a lot of awakening going on. And I think we're realizing some behaviors and thoughts and ways of society weren't right to begin with. But now, things are sort of coming to light. And we're being called to step up and to open up and to wise up and all of those good things, right? So I think the one piece that still feels like it's a little too behind is the disconnect that some people have with some animals.
Adrienne MacIain 1:51
Tell us more about that.
Kristen Joy 1:53
Yeah, so I'm primarily speaking about food. Although I guess, you know, we could go into the broader range of how animals are used. But what has really shifted for me has been this passion behind, I guess, opening people's eyes to animals as food, and whether that's okay, or whether it's even in alignment with their own personal morals and values.
Adrienne MacIain 2:23
Right, let's step back for a second and talk a little bit more about you. You were saying how a lot of people are awakening right now. And I think that is so true on so many levels. And I think there's this general sense of, oh, no, we're realizing that things are unsustainable, like that the system is unsustainable. But I think the bigger question, as you said, is, was this system the right system to begin with? Do we want to sustain this system? Or do we want something new entirely, and I think, this piece of it, that piece of being in balance, and being in harmony, with nature, with all the other creatures, all the other life on this planet, is a huge one. And trying to question that relationship of basically master slave, that we look at animals as, you know, products as resources for us to use. I think that's a big thing we need to look at and say, does that feel good in our soul?
Kristen Joy 3:29
Yes, I agree with that, because especially I think we segregate animals into, I named this one, I call this one: pet. I also call it George or whatever you might name your pet, I invite this one into my house, versus I wear this one, I eat this one, right? there's just there's an imbalance there and how we perceive creatures.
Adrienne MacIain 3:56
Yeah, and you if you look back at the history of how we've treated other humans, that is reflected there, too, that we like to classify things into, you know, well, these are these are useful humans, and these are garbage. You know, and that's terrible. That's just wrong on so many levels. We are connected to everything. And so anytime you try to make something less than you, that's just wrong. And it's going to come back at you.
Kristen Joy 4:23
Yep, and I think the more we know about the quote unquote, "other," the more we can see eye to eye, or at least appreciate their humanity and the qualities about them. And so obviously, there's not humanity and animals, but there are things that we share in common, you know, pain and relationships and fear and siblings and motherly love, all of those things. So I just think as we're awakening, we should just remember: let's awaken it all.
Adrienne MacIain 4:54
Yeah, and I think some species are closer to us than we realize, in terms of their culture, when you look at elephants, how they mourn their dead, the grieving process that they go through, it's really similar to what we do and how we handled death. When you look at dolphins and some of their social relationships and the way they play together, I think it really can start to open your eyes to the fact that, you know, we're not so different than we think we are.
Kristen Joy 5:29
Yeah, I agree with that. And I think the more we realize that, the more we start to question some of the choices that we were making, just like subconsciously, right, just because society has done it this way, or because we were raised this way, it's the more we, the more we see the commonality, then I think the true like love that lives within us, as humans in our heart in our soul really comes out and helps us really to connect to everyone and everything.
Adrienne MacIain 5:58
Absolutely. I also want to say, I think we can learn a lot from animals about the bad things that we do to you know, they, they have vices, just like we do, and they have problems just like we do, you know, going back to dolphins, they've observed dolphins basically get gang raping and doing terrible things. So, you know, it's like, they're... I think we hold them up on a pedestal at the same time that we kind of looked down on them. And both are wrong.
Kristen Joy 6:27
Yeah, that's an interesting point, too. I volunteer at a wildlife rescue rehab and release center, and we would have ducks come in all the time that were gang raped. And it's like, horrifying, right? And then I also think, like, well, that's maybe the animal nature, right? And so it's like, we can see things that are like gory and seem cruel in the animal world. But then as humans, we also have, like a more evolved brain where we have the ability to, you know, rationalize and to learn and to think like, oh, that's probably not a good decision, or a fair decision or a loving decision. Right?
Adrienne MacIain 7:06
Right. We have that choice. Yeah, absolutely. So tell us a little bit more about your personal journey into this. Where did this kind of discovery come from? And how has that changed your life?
Kristen Joy 7:20
Yeah. It was very unexpected. I was raised--my mom cooked meals for us, like home cooked meals, beautiful, so much love going into them--but raised eating what we call meat, never questioned it. Never thought about it. Always thought I love animals. I probably loved cats best of all, because I was raised with cats. But so I never ever thought about what was on my plate in terms of it being like, a being. And then as I ended up getting, I was having allergic reactions randomly, that took the form of it's called angioedema. So I would have swelling of my lip, and sometimes swelling of my eye, or, you know, one or the other, or both. And I couldn't figure out what was causing it. But it was so debilitating, because as an actor, or you know, as a product specialist, like being in the public eye, I couldn't have a part of my body just swell up and continue on with my job, right. So it would cause me a lot of stress. And I went to an allergist, and he ran those typical patterns. And my results came back that like, I was barely allergic to anything. And that's like handful of things that I was alerted to, he was like, there's no way he would cause this. So basically, I had no answers. However, there was a marker, the ANA marker for me was elevated. And oftentimes when people have lupus, ANAs are elevated. So I said to him, Well, so what do I do? You know, and he was like, Oh, nothing, you know, don't worry about it. Like just come back in like six months, we'll check your values. And I was like, check my values?? And then all of a sudden, I have lupus, and then you put me on a medication? Like, is that what the plan is? And he literally, looked at me blankly and was like, you know, a shrug of the shoulders like, 'Ya caught me.' You know? Yeah. So that started me down the path, and I was pretty mad. So I've always loved the body and loved science and figuring out how things work. And I'm also pretty, like, kind of a go-getter. So if there's a problem, I want to find a solution, right? So I thought, 'Okay, well, there's got to be somebody who can help me.' And I ended up working with a nutritionist, and the nutritionist basically put me on a clean diet, but it involved lean proteins in the in the form of animals. Again, I didn't think twice about it, just now I was eating organic primarily, and pasture-raised, and making the best choices that I possibly could, and the issue resolved itself. So I was like, 'Wow, there is real power in what we put in our mouths,' right? We really have a lot of control over our health. So it was like a good awakening for me. And I think I thought that's the path I'm going to be on with diet. Cut to... which then brings us nicely into the meditation piece, because it's a big part of what I do in my life and in my practice with women, I ended up meeting indirectly--lots of story there--but meeting a guru who I studied with, and he put us into a process that was three months of being basically vegetarian. And I was like, 'Whoa, what am I going to do? What am I going to eat? How am I going to do this autoimmune protocol if I can only eat vegetables?' So that really I was like, forced into becoming vegetarian in the beginning. So yeah, I was like, What am I going to do? And I started, you know, doing all those thoughts that some people do, like, 'How am I going to live without bacon?' Like, I feel like that's always like the go-to: 'But... bacon!'
Adrienne MacIain 11:30
'But bacon! It's so good!'
Kristen Joy 11:33
Right. And for me, it was, I used to eat--not often, because it's not a healthy food, but it's like a delicious every once in a while thing, I used to eat Rubens. So I was like, 'I'm not going to be able to have a Reuben!' You know. And then there was also the thought that I am type O-negative. And there's this whole system of like eating for your blood type. And it was like, well, if you're, O-negative, you have to eat meat, you know. So there's all of this coming at me. So I was vegetarian for probably the first month, and I wasn't really feeling great. And that just reiterated in my mind: see, I have to eat animals! But again, still not seeing them as animals. It's really like seeing it as meat, I have to eat *meat*. What I think was happening was a detoxification, I figured out my body was adjusting, you know, I was getting rid of all those added hormones, all of the pesticides, all of the you know, everything that is done to meat, especially in this country, right. So I think my body was feeling those effects. Plus, I probably wasn't making the best nutritional choices, being a new vegetarian, because I just really didn't know any better. So I would say, a couple of months, I was still like taking like three hour naps in the middle of the day, you know, but so dedicated to the meditation practice, I wasn't going to stop. And towards the end, I started to actually feel better than I had ever felt. So I wasn't getting sick, I wasn't getting headaches, I was feeling just like consistent energy, like, people would say to me, like, how do you have so much energy, and I would be like, super foods, like, it's literally my diet. Again, I don't know if I was necessarily equating it to being vegetarian, it was just like all the pieces coming together, you know? And then at some point, I think it was coming to the end of the process, and I could return to whatever behaviors I want. Although in my guru's teachings, and possibly a lot of spiritual teachings, they do say, being vegetarian is the best because it's pure, you're not taking on the karma of the dead animal, all of those things. But I was free to make my own choice. And I think that's when I started going down that terrible rabbit hole of watching the PETA videos and like, the movies, right? And like, I am super sensitive when it comes to animal cruelty specifically, but just like, I don't know, sadness and cruelty in general. So when I started to watch those things, I was like, 'Oh, wow.' And something shifted in me where I could no longer see meat as food. It was really like body parts. So I would go into a grocery store and I would be like, holy cow. Look at that whole butcher case of like, body parts. Like I couldn't see it any other way. Which isn't necessarily a great thing. But it was something that I think was solidifying for me like there's no going back, you know?
Adrienne MacIain 14:42
Yeah. Absolutely. Gosh, I have so much to say about all of that. So one of the things I want, you know, I told you this in advance, and I knew this would come up, but so my entire household decided to go vegan recently. And this happened because we were watching a movie, it was a documentary called The Game Changers. And if you haven't seen it, basically it focuses on how you know, there's this kind of myth that you need meat to get protein and to be an athlete, or a bodybuilder or anything like this, that being vegan specifically is just like a terrible idea. And this documentary just blows that theory completely out of the water, and shows how these athletes are becoming the best in class basically, by going vegan. And so that, and also the fact that there's all this toxic masculinity wrapped up in this idea of like, meat is for real men, and real men eat meat. And if you don't eat meat, then you're not a real man. And you know, unpacking all that cultural baggage around that was really powerful for my husband, David. And he is watching this and going, 'Oh, my gosh, I bought that, like I bought into that big time.' And it turns out, it's just completely false. And you know, he like a lot of men his age, worries about cholesterol worries about a heart attack worries about all the things that tend to kill men, especially, but people in general in this country. And so we decided as a household, let's just do an experiment, and go vegan for a month. Now, I used to be vegan, I was vegan for four years. And I was vegetarian for 10 years, back in my younger days. And basically what changed that is I went to Africa, and it was just really impossible to get my nutritional needs met as a vegetarian in Africa. And so then I just kind of didn't go back because it was just so much easier. But you know, now that I-- it's so funny, I always say it's like when you have like a really messy room, right? It just feels overwhelming. And it's like, oh, just throw it anywhere, you know, you get new junk, and you're just like, whatever, throw it over there. But once you start to clean up, it becomes this thing of like you things stand out to you. And you're like, 'Oh, I have to get rid of that too. Oh my god, I don't want that there!' And then when you have a clean room, it's like any little thing that comes in there that doesn't belong stands out immediately. And so I think when you start to clean up your diet, and when you start to clean up your body, and you start to kind of clean up your ethics and realize, like, 'Oh my gosh, I've been treating these animals like, you know, meat.' It really starts to... you start to see it, you start to see it everywhere. And you start to see the way that animals are treated and the way that you've treated animals and the way that you've treated your body to and the stuff that you've allowed yourself to put in there and just be like, 'Oh, well, you know, it tastes good. So, whatever.' It's kind of like you were saying about that whole 'But bacon!' When I'm eating like an omnivore, you know, I love bacon, bacon is delicious. But as soon as I go vegan, and this is again, the second time I've done this, I realize I don't want that in my body. Like the very idea of it actually makes me a little bit sick. And it's because you start to realize how it makes you feel, and how, like the result of it gets tied up into the flavor of it. And suddenly it doesn't taste so good anymore. It actually tastes kind of yuck.
Kristen Joy 18:32
Yeah, it's it is so interesting how, like, we just get clearer, you know, like our taste buds get clearer, like our bodies obviously are getting clear. So yeah, that things even like when I cleaned up not talking about just vegetarian, but like getting rid of some of the toxicity, you know, going organic and just like cleaning chemicals, like if I smell like bleach now my headache, and I don't feel good. And it's like, that never bothered me before. You know, it was just as toxic then, you know, but my body is like, we don't accept this anymore.
Adrienne MacIain 19:06
Yeah, and my husband, oh my god, poor guy, the detox that he has gone through, because he's never, you know, done anything with his diet before. Like, he just always ate whatever was in front of him and whatever sounded good.
Kristen Joy 19:20
Bless him for doing this and bless you.
Adrienne MacIain 19:24
My goodness. And you know, luckily for him, he's got me who's been on this ride before. And so I know that he needs protein and he can't just eat, you know, whatever he feels like as long as he's taking out animal products, like you have to actually add in all the good power foods and the combined proteins, all that stuff. And so I'm here to help him kind of keep his nutrition up, but at the same time, man, just like you said, he's been sleeping like crazy, and getting crazy, awful headaches. Just, you know, he's like, 'I thought this would make me feel better. And I just feel so much worse.' And I'm like, 'Stick with it, babe. Stick with it. And he finally today is like, 'I feel great! Wow, I feel amazing. Like I've never felt this good.'
Kristen Joy 20:16
I hope he's at a turning point. Beautiful!
Adrienne MacIain 20:20
I'm really hoping, yeah, cuz I was like, okay, I thought, you know, maybe at the two week mark things would get better but it's been it's been pretty much a month. Yeah.
Kristen Joy 20:29
Yeah I swear my, like, suffering for lack of a better word would lasted way longer than a month the first time that I had done it. So yeah, there's light at the end of the tunnel.
Adrienne MacIain 20:38
Yeah, but it's a lot, you know, it's a lot to come out of.
Kristen Joy 20:44
Sure is, because it's challenging. You know, food is obviously so complicated, right? It's like tied with comfort. It's tied with like tradition, it's tied with family. So there's a lot there. So that's why it's, you know, when I started first talking about this, it made me a little bit uncomfortable. Because I don't want to make people uncomfortable in a way that just hurts them. Right? I don't, I don't mind making people uncomfortable in a way that like it might open their eyes. And then it might help make the world a better place. But I don't want to be a jerk. And I don't want to like rub people the wrong way. So that like there's no good that comes out of it, you know. So it is something that I'm like trying to be so mindful when I speak about it. But I think that like, because I'm so clear on like, what it has done for me and like how much it's helped me and how much like I just care. It's getting easier, you know?
Adrienne MacIain 21:37
Absolutely. It is an important balance. You know, I definitely found last time that I was vegan, the reason that it was so difficult for me, and the reason I actually stopped in the end was just because I felt like I was imposing on other people so much that I would go to somebody's house and be the problem child where I couldn't eat the thing that they serve me and I would have to be like, I can't really eat this, sorry. And so one of the things that I've really learned is, be proactive, make food in advance, if you get invited to somebody's house, bring delicious vegan food, you know, bring delicious vegetarian food so that you don't feel like you're causing a problem, you're actually bringing them a gift. When you go, you know, when you go out to eat, just be mindful about the places that you go and go to restaurants that you know are going to have good options for you. You know, and if you have, one of the things that I really, really realized is important to me, is, you know, don't judge yourself so harshly. Like if, if if you have to shift or change things, like as long as you're making that effort. And the vast majority of your diet is plant based. Like you're doing good, you're doing good. It's okay. You know, you can't change the whole world with you know, one one diet, you put totally, but you can do the best for you and for you know, your family, and absolutely that example for the people around you.
Kristen Joy 23:09
Absolutely. And I'm not vegan, right? So it's like, some people I'm sure are gonna be like, 'Well, why aren't you vegan?' You know, because you care so much about animals, and you've seen all the movies, and you know, and I make a lot of vegan choices, but I'm not 100% I don't know if I will go 100% for me what I'm what I'm doing, and I've been vegetarian now for almost 13 years. That's a lot. That's a lot of lives saved, you know, like, I feel very comfortable with the choices that are making. So to your point, it's like, just feeling to yourself, is this feeling right? Like, don't be so hard on yourself, do the best you can continue to learn and grow and make the changes, the more information that comes in. But beating ourselves up is never going to help any cause right?
Adrienne MacIain 23:54
No, absolutely not. But yeah, that thing of like feel into your body and see, like, is this right for me? But give it some time to... if it's not working for you, you know, in the first couple of weeks or even months like yeah, maybe that's some detoxing that needs to happen. Give it some time before you say this is not right for me, this is not working for me.
Kristen Joy 24:17
Yes, that's a very good point. I feel like most of the problems happen with the mindset around it, right? Like I was so quick to be like, well, I'm O-negative, so I need to eat meat. It's like well, no, because now 13 years later I have no autoimmune issues, I have no allergies, like all of those things are gone. And I didn't follow any specific protocol that said, you have to do this. I followed what tasted good, what felt good, what was getting me results and what was in alignment with my like morals and values.
Adrienne MacIain 24:52
You know, bodies are so complicated, and everybody's body really is a little bit different. And so I really don't think there's a magic bullet for everybody. But I do think that it's really important for each one of us to really take a long, hard look at what we are choosing to put in our bodies and what we are choosing to support. Because if you are eating animal products, you really have to look at the the system that is, you know, creating those products, which is slavery, you know, animal slavery, um, and I, you know, I don't want to be that vegan who's like, you know, like you said, I really want to, like, be gentle and let people make their own choices. I'm just really encouraging everybody, to, to do your own research, find out what's really going on out there and see if that's something that you want to keep supporting.
Kristen Joy 25:52
Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, I appreciate that. I, when I packed up--because we've been, you know, traveling around a bunch--when I packed up I... so, I use my body as a billboard. So because I work as an actor and a model, like I won't support companies unless I believe in them, or they're paying me--well, I'd have to believe in them in order for them to pay me, right, let's get that clear. But so, the things that I wear are things that like I care about, I'm, you know, being supportive of. I'm like making a little bit of a statement for myself, you know, so when I was packing up going through all of these T-shirts, and they're like, feminist T-shirts, and there's some like animal ones, but a lot of them are feminists, let's be honest. I was thinking what states am I going to be going through? And like, am I going to be comfortable wearing these T-shirts, you know, and no one until this past weekend has ever said anything about a shirt I'm wearing. And this past weekend, we went to this like amazing, like local, not local, an artist festival outdoors, where artists come from all over and they show like their most magical creations. It was so good. And I was wearing a T-shirt that said 'Runs on veggies.' So you know, not pushing anybody's buttons. And some guy walks up to me, and he's like, 'Does your shirt say runs on veggies?' And I said, 'Yeah.' And he said, mine would say runs on beef.' And I was like, 'Okay, all right, here we go,' you know. And I was like, and you know, I want to be centered and like, in a good place. And I want to be clear about like, what's happening and what I share and my intentions. And let's also say: I had had a beer. So that's not a great time for me to be clear and centered and mindful, you know. So what I think is beautiful about like, side note, having a meditation practice is I feel that I'm guided and protected a lot. So I think what happened in this moment was like, you know, the powers that be the universe, the magic, my intuition sort of coming in and helping me to be, you know, comfortable with the way that what I said and like, how I behaved, but I just said, it sounds like we have different values, you know, and he said, something like, 'Well, you know, my coworker has been getting on me all the time about becoming vegetarian, because he's a vegetarian.' So I was like, 'Oh, interesting,' because from looking at him, I'm sure part of what his co worker was, is worried about his health. Right? So it's like, so now in his consciousness, he's thinking vegetarian, vegetable, so he sees my shirt. And I don't know if it's like if he's being aggressive towards me, or confrontational, but there's a good chance that a seed has been planted for him. And now I'm seed number two, you know, or whatever it is. So I walked away from that, like, with so many feelings, he ended up saying, like, you know, 'I love your shirt, it's great,' whatever. And I walked away from that with so many things. Like, you know, of course, the man that comes up and like, you know, says something about my shirt like that. And then also, like, I wonder what his, where he was coming from. And then I was like, well, wasn't it nice that it's another seed planted, like all of the things, but I just, it was such a, like, beautiful experience for whatever it was to be maybe a teacher, but to also be a student, right?
Adrienne MacIain 29:16
Always so many good opportunities to learn everywhere we go, right? I wanted to go back to something you said earlier, you were talking about a doctor that you saw, and how he just sort of said, you know, oh, you caught me. I had a similar experience recently. I have this thing on the side of my head. And I don't know if you can actually see it there. But it's this little thing that kind of comes and goes which, when the sun comes out, it starts to bleed. Now that doesn't seem good to me. Right? Now, I don't know that it's skin cancer, exactly. But like, man, that doesn't seem normal, right? If sun shines on your skin, and then it bleeds like, hmmm, that may be a problem, I think.
Kristen Joy 30:06
But you're not a vampire or like a witch or anything, are you?
Adrienne MacIain 30:09
Well, I might be a witch. But that's unrelated, I feel. So I go to this doctor, and I just, you know, pointed it out. And I said, 'This thing kind of periodically comes and goes, and in the sun, it tends to bleed. And she said, Well, do you scratch it? You know, are you scratching it, because it's itchy? And I was like, 'Well, sometimes,' you know, because it scabs over and then it's itchy. And so I scratch it. And, and I was like, 'Yeah, sometimes.' And she said, 'Okay, well just put some hydrocortisone on it, it'll be fine.' And so I did that for a year. I put hydrocortisone cream on it every day. And it still comes back. And so you know, I went to the doctor again. And I was like, 'Hey, so you know, you told me to put some hydrocortisone on this. But, like, it's not going away. You know, it keeps coming back.' And she's like, 'Oh, well, then it's probably an Actinic Keratosis' (is I think what she said). And I was like, 'What's that? And she's like, well, it's the first stage of skin cancer. So we should definitely get that looked at.' And I was like, so I've had the first stage of skin cancer for a year. And you just basically told me, like, put some cream on it, it'll be fine. And that really bothered me, you know?
Kristen Joy 31:32
As it should!
Adrienne MacIain 31:33
Yeah, the fact that I've been, you know, I've changed my diet. And I've been, you know, really focusing on like getting as healthy as as I can be through nutrition, because I really do think that, you know, food is medicine. That makes me feel better about that. But at the same time, it was really disturbing to me that, you know, our medical system is so siloed, you know, that they can only look at one thing at a time, instead of looking holistically at like, what's what all is going on here and listening to people when they say, this doesn't seem right to me, like, my body's telling me something's wrong. And I so often feel shut down. When I come in and say things like that. And I know, especially women of color, experienced that a lot, feeling shut down, when they come in and say like, I think this is really going on with me. So can you talk a little bit more about like, that, that body intuition and how we as women can kind of empower ourselves, especially when we go into, you know, the medical community?
Kristen Joy 32:36
It's definitely challenging. You know, I think that it's connected to, especially as women, obviously, I can only speak for myself, but like I, you know, sometimes I speak on behalf of women, but I don't mean to blanket us, but that our society doesn't teach us to use our voice and to use our voice strongly, or to use our voice loudly. Or, you know, all the things that like men are allowed to do or expected of men are that we turn, you know, a blind eye to whatever. So I think a big piece is like getting comfortable and confident within ourselves knowing that like, we have a right, especially when it's about our own bodies, like, I mean, this is this is what carries our being around our entire lives. Like if we don't have a right to control this or ask questions about it, who does? Right. So I completely understand though, like going into a doctor's office, there's limited time, first of all, right? It's like, they are like this. So you got to have your questions, which you know, they often don't either have the time for them, or maybe don't have the kinds of answers that somebody like me or maybe like you would be looking for right? So did they're doing the best they can possibly do with limited time, limited information, maybe limited interest, maybe they don't even want to like know about nutrition, maybe they don't even believe in the science behind it, right. So I think what's important is getting clear on what you're feeling, what you're experiencing, paying attention to that, you know, and starting to really make notes about it. I think it's so important like people get hopefully people get their bloodwork every year. It's really up to you to make sure that your blood work is staying consistent, like year to year. Like I always tell my clients like make sure you're checking, you get your results from this year check last year what's changed, like always be aware of what is changing for you. Because your doctor has too many patients and their own health and their own family. They can't keep track of all of these nuances. So besides tuning in listening, you really have to be your own researcher and statistician and all of that, which may sound like a lot because our lives are all very full, but if you just get into the habit of like, okay, I just saw my doctor, when I get the labs back, I'm going to just reference last year's, it's going to take 10 minutes, you know, I'm going to be aware. And then you come to your doctor with maybe some questions, right. And if they don't have time for it, that's what second opinions are for. Doctors are going to hate to hear this, but I think that's what Google's for.
Adrienne MacIain 35:24
Well, I think you have to be your own advocate, too, you know, and I actually, a wonderful woman of color taught this to me, this little trick, which is when you go into a doctor's office, and you ask them to do something more to prescribe you something or to, you know, to run a test, and they refuse, ask them to please write that in your record. Say, 'Can you please make a note that you're refusing to test me for that? Or, 'Can you just please make a note that you're not going to pursue that?' And nine times out of 10, just that little trigger will make them go, 'You know, actually, if you really think this is important, let's do it.'
Kristen Joy 36:01
Adrienne MacIain 36:02
Kristen Joy 36:04
So which is interesting. I just, I wonder what the besides like malpractice, and worrying about that, I wonder, like, what would that doesn't? It seems like what, why why is that all that it takes, you know, anyway?
Adrienne MacIain 36:19
Well, I think it is partly a malpractice thing. But it's also, when you say that, I think it makes them realize you're serious about this, this is not just something that you're just curious about, like this means something to you, and you want that noted on your record for the next person who comes along. And I think that's a cue to them to say, oh, she really means business.
Kristen Joy 36:42
Yeah, okay, good point.
Adrienne MacIain 36:44
Yeah. So it's about that time to transition into my little visualization exercise that I love to do with my guests. I see you getting comfortable. You know what's coming. So, let's close our eyes. And I'm gonna have you breathe in colored light. Just take a nice, deep breath. Beautiful. And then tell me what color your light was?
Kristen Joy 37:18
Adrienne MacIain 37:20
Take another breath. Was it the same or different this time?
Kristen Joy 37:30
Oh, now I'm pulling in hues of pink.
Adrienne MacIain 37:33
I love it. I love it. Okay, so I'm going to wave my magic wand over here. And everything is now exactly as it should be. Not just for you, but for the whole world. The world is just as it should be. Everything that you deeply desire is now real. And just tell me what you see in this new ideal reality.
Kristen Joy 38:04
The first thing that I pictured was just people smiling. So then it's just this energy of joy and acceptance. And just this feeling that like, everyone is a friend.
Adrienne MacIain 38:24
That's beautiful. And I want you to tell me what you hear.
Kristen Joy 38:33
So in this magical perfect world, I hear sounds that are all natural sounds. So the birds chirping and the breeze rustling in the limbs of the trees. And some, maybe some geckos scurrying along the ground. I can hear the sound of my own heartbeat because I'm so still and centered within myself.
Adrienne MacIain 39:09
I want you to feel the grass, on your toes, on your bare feet. And just decide you're going to take a little walk. And you can feel that grass and you can feel the sun on you as you start to walk. And as you walk, you start to see animals. And I want you to tell me what you see as you go by.
Kristen Joy 39:43
I get the image of me all of a sudden being I think, is it Snow White? Yes. Except, you know, I think she's blonde in this visualization, or, you know, at least blonde hair even if it has dark roots.
Adrienne MacIain 39:57
Cinderella also had animal friends if you recall.
Kristen Joy 39:59
Okay. All right, good. So I picture them all just coming around, like knowing that I'm a safe space and that I'm, you know, an a friend and ally, like, knowing that we're all connected. So I picture them, just climbing all over me running around me, just doing their own thing, but also engaging with me out of like love and curiosity.
Adrienne MacIain 40:28
So they kind of lead you to a space, a little clearing, that just feels really ideal to you. Tell me about it?
Kristen Joy 40:41
Well, this is interesting, because I wouldn't picture that I would go there. But I picture myself like on the very edge of a cliff, overlooking, like mountains and Valley, like fog and trees.
Adrienne MacIain 40:57
And so you're sitting there looking out at this just peaceful, balanced world, this beautiful reality, where nothing is out of whack. And I want you to just feel that for a moment, the peace that brings. There's nothing to fix. There's nothing to change. Everything is just as it should be. And then something unexpectedly wonderful. happens. What is it?
Kristen Joy 41:40
I have a butterfly landing on my nose. And it doesn't scare me. It's just gentle and beautiful. And like a little miracle.
Adrienne MacIain 41:51
Wonderful. And I want you to feel like you can actually communicate with that butterfly. Like you can kind of feel what it's trying to communicate to you. What does that butterfly want you to know.
Kristen Joy 42:06
She wants me to know that I have wings too.
Adrienne MacIain 42:12
I want you to feel that you have wings. you genuinely have just sprouted wings. And I want you to take them for a spin. Tell me what that feels like.
Kristen Joy 42:26
Oh, now I know why I'm at the edge of the cliff. There you go is Yeah, this is like a beautiful like complete, release and surrender. So diving off the cliff and just feeling supported and lifted by the wind, but also exhilarated by the just the adrenaline and the joy of being able to do something like this.
Adrienne MacIain 42:51
Well, I think that's a perfect place to stop. I'm going to have you open your eyes there. What a beautiful metaphor for leaping and letting the universe catch you. That was cool. It's always fun, isn't it? Like you? You think you know what you're gonna see? And then you see something completely different?
Kristen Joy 43:16
Yeah, I love just that. You can, we can create spaces where we could just be open and then have like, just beautiful things come into our reality. Because I don't know if I would have scripted that. But that was beautiful.
Adrienne MacIain 43:30
Yeah. Beautiful. Well, thank you so so much for being here and for sharing your beautiful experience and wisdom with my audience. Can you please tell them where they can find more of your wonderfulness?
Kristen Joy 43:45
Of course! Well, first of all, thank you so much. It was a pleasure and an honor. I much appreciate it. So I can be found at VoluptuousLife.com. First, you'll have to learn how to spell it then you can find it: voluptuous, there's no m, people mispronounce it all the time. So voluptuouslife.com. And that is my Instagram and my Facebook as well: @VoluptuousLife. So that's basically the best way to find me and I'm happy to receive emails with questions. I'm here to support.
Adrienne MacIain 44:14
And I'll have that spelling in the show notes.
Kristen Joy 44:17
Adrienne MacIain 44:17
No problem. You don't even have to look it up.
Alright, have yourself a beautiful, wonderful day. My dear.
Kristen Joy 44:23
Thank you so much. You too.