Updated: Feb 25
Adrienne MacIain 0:00
Hey everyone, welcome to the That's Aloud podcast. This is your hostess Adrienne MacIain, and I'm here today with Ana Levin. Please introduce yourself.
Ana Levin 0:10
Hi, thank you for having me. I am Ana. I am, this is interesting, I am a woman. I am a foreigner. There's so much to me.
Adrienne MacIain 0:22
Ana Levin 0:22
Yes. Let’s just start there.
Adrienne MacIain 0:25
Beautiful. So the question I usually start with, just to see kind of what this shakes loose, is what's the story you're not telling?
Ana Levin 0:33
Yes, that's such a good question. There's so many, but I think the most crucial one in these days, especially since the quarantine, the story I'm not telling openly and I'm so ready to tell is the fact that I was born a feeler. And for many, many years, I've made myself wrong. And I am very ready to share my being a feeler with everybody and what came through that. From that embrace, right?
Adrienne MacIain 1:08
I am feeling that so hard, like you can see, I'm... Oh my gosh, that resonates with me so much. So many of us who are empaths and feelers have told ourselves over and over again, no, that's not marketable. That's not, you know, that's not a job, not valuable, nobody needs that. And that's just so wrong, so wrong.
Ana Levin 1:31
You know what I see a little bit, what I have been able to observe is that we, especially as women, we didn't have a lot of, you know, people that looked like that kind of heart leadership. So when we saw that in ourselves, we didn't know how to lead with it. At least for myself.
Adrienne MacIain 1:51
Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. It is. Yeah, it was really hard to find role models for heart-centered female leaders. Absolutely.
Ana Levin 2:03
Yes. But it's a beautiful, sorry to interrupt, it's a beautiful space that we are in us, especially as women, I think we're so special and sacred. And this is the time to do it differently and come from our heart. And it's like, I almost feel like we need, like, a feeling revolution.
Adrienne MacIain 2:26
Ana Levin 2:28
Because we're not feeling!
Adrienne MacIain 2:32
God, that's so true. I was just gonna say that women, you know, who were in power when I was growing up, at least, I think to make it to that place had to pretend to be men in a lot of ways, and had to adopt even more so, kind of go even further into machismo in a sense, in order to survive and to thrive in that, you know, culture. So yeah, I completely agree, I think it's time for that revolution. I think more and more women are waking up to their heart center and recognizing how valuable that is, and finding ways to give that gift to the world. So yes, I agree, this is a very exciting time. So where does that begin for you?
Ana Levin 3:18
Well, the feeling you mean?
Adrienne MacIain 3:21
Where does it begin that, you know, the story of you realizing, Whoa, wait a second, I'm a feeler, but I've been blocking that or not feeling like that was valuable. Where does that story begin for you?
Ana Levin 3:36
I realized I was a feeler like, as a kid. Early on, I noticed how I was in, you know, even the way I looked at nature or the way I looked at people and relationships and even going to church and saying, like, what god are you talking about? Like the god I'm connecting to, he's all love, there's no judgment. I mean, what is that? There were so many things about the world that it didn't fit in, into my heart. My heart was almost like bigger than what they were, what I was seeing. And see, I dropped my amethyst. But it really started with seeing that I was so good at surviving. And I asked myself, I wonder what living would feel like? In order to do that, I had to be able to feel and trust and, you know, get to know my heart. Now with that question came a whole array of things that I had to work through. And this is where I think a lot of us get discouraged, because when we start to feel we actually have to look at things and patterns, you know, experiences that perhaps were not pleasant because the decisions that we make for ourselves from our heads, it's very different than when it comes from our heart. So I have have a lot of compassion for people. And I feel like that's one of the best gifts that I can give people when I work with them is really loving them wherever they're at, not wanting them to be any other place that they're at, and helping them actually process those feelings that were suppressed and get past it so that they can actually live more joyfully and more aligned, right, and more alive as well.
Adrienne MacIain 5:33
Yeah. So you said 'I dropped my amethyst.' What does the amethyst do? Why is it with you right now?
Ana Levin 5:40
I have, yes, this is a beautiful, I don't know, I do a lot of my healings, holding this amethyst and if you, you know, believe in energy, it's just had a lot of good Mojo for me.
Adrienne MacIain 5:53
Ana Levin 5:53
I like to, I like to fidget with my amethyst, you know, whenever I'm talking.
Adrienne MacIain 5:58
That's great. No, I have a little obsidian that I sometimes hold 'cause it's for, like, emotional sort of fortification, if I'm having a difficult conversation, I'll often have that in my hand.
Ana Levin 6:11
Yes! I think is, you know, and as silly as it may sound, because many of us come from academia, right, or the world, these are the most natural things to do. They come from Mother Earth, like ashes to ashes. That's where we come from. So that's really at the forefront of my current passion and my message, to spread, and to hold the space for people to, for all of us, to realize that we have an array of beautiful healing methods and things that we can connect that can really give us an amazing life, as opposed to just popping a pill only. You know what I mean?
Adrienne MacIain 6:58
Yeah, absolutely. So, the next question is, what was the kind of climax pop point, sometimes it's a rock bottom, sometimes it's kind of a climax point, in the hero's journey would be sort of the culmination of your initiation, where there's the kind of big boss battle. What was that moment for you where you realized something has to change?
Ana Levin 7:21
Yes. And I hope, I would hope that it was a little bit more, like, but this is how it went. We went to church with my family, my ex-husband, and we had an altercation with my ex-husband. And I got really concerned for my physical safety, though nothing happened. I remained centered as much as I could and peaceful, right, and I went inside, and I'm washing my hands in the sink in the kitchen. This is the non elegant part. And I kid you not, this almost like my own voice was talking to me. So I guess, let's say my higher self was talking to me. And that's when I heard myself saying to myself, I'm so done surviving. I wonder what living would be like? I have no idea what living is like. And that simple, I mean, and it was just so peaceful, even in the midst of such a turbulent time, righ? My kids were little, so I'm trying to protect them, I'm trying not to blow up or yell or anything like that. Trying to contain, right, the chaotic moment. And yet my soul was like, so, you know, when it's the right thing? You're like, Yes, that's it! And that's what started, you know, to change my life drastically. Drastically.
Adrienne MacIain 9:03
So, when did the tide start to turn up after that? What started to happen that you were like, Hmm, maybe there's a better way? Maybe I can get out of this.
Ana Levin 9:14
Yes. And I like that question too, because up is such a subjective...
Adrienne MacIain 9:21
Ana Levin 9:22
Right. Because one of my biggest lessons in the past seven years, when this question arose in my head, the biggest lesson is perhaps the respect and the appreciation that I have now risen that I didn't have at the beginning. At the beginning, you know, when you're like, Oh, yes, I have this aha moment, therefore, my life is now different, but it's not, it doesn't happen like that. There's a lot of water that has to go under the bridge. So going back to the question, yes, it was automatic, because just the fact that I was asking myself that question, that was huge going up. Huge. But I would say, in less than a month, I actually met my husband, Danny. And it was such a soul connection such as soul recognition, inexplainable, but undeniable. And so I, and then I received the message 'Trust in the power of your heart.' And I literally saw, I was praying, and I literally saw like a fork in the road, and I see the head and the heart. And it's like God was telling me you can follow one or the other, you can choose. I'm like, well duh, I'm gonna pick the heart, you know, I'm gonna pick this message. Little did I know what that would entail. And that was the beginning of really going up and a lot of, ooh, a lot of undoing of stories, expectations, what life should look like at a certain age. I mean, a lot of undoing that and really stepping to a higher, a higher love, a higher purpose. So grateful, so grateful, I would do it over and over again. And I know in the midst of it sometimes, you know, I would feel that like, I wasn't that graceful going through it. But I think all of us, I mean, I'm gonna give myself some self-love because I truly trust to be graceful through such a huge transition. On the other end, I wouldn't, I wouldn't, I would do it all over again, because what I have gained is, yeah, a bigger love, a bigger understanding of what love truly is, and how love never dies, love gets, it's an energy of creation, and it just continues to transform and create new creations. And so, till this day, I can say that I have a great, loving relationship with my ex-husband. I, you know, let me tell you a story about love and how it transformed, going up to the question they were asking me. When we got divorced, my husband was dating this girl, and she had a lot of medical issues. And one day, I like to pray, I mean, obviously, I like to pray and meditate a lot. And I was like, in meditation, and I hear pray for this lady. And I was like, what, like, well, and so again, with like, the talking to myself, right? Why would I pray for this lady when society feels like this is the one that you're supposed to be jealous about, or whatever. And the voice says to me, because she is you and you are her. And I started crying. And it was such a beautiful example of, of being one, because I didn't like, you know, a person that I will be, I will be willing to see myself as. Really, really beautiful blessing, beautiful blessing. So that's just an example of how my love has been able to grow based on the initial moment of saying, I wonder what living would be like and then accepting the message that was being given to me. Trust in the power of your heart. Trust without even knowing that your heart is powerful enough to love beyond the stories the world crafts.
Adrienne MacIain 13:55
Yes, I think so many people look at love as a zero sum game, that the more you give, the less you have, and that is exactly the opposite of the truth. The more love you give, the more love you have to give and receive and all that love is self-perpetuating. Yeah. So that, what a beautiful story. I love that so much.
Ana Levin 14:18
Adrienne MacIain 14:19
What What do you think has blocked you from sharing this story before now?
Ana Levin 14:24
Well, like we talked about before, the preconceptions, right, of, well, who's gonna buy love? I mean, my message is trust in the power of your heart, like dadadada. Right? I mean, it's not like it, that has nothing to do with my degrees or that. Yeah, I would say it was me. It was my own, getting in my own head. To be completely honest, and this is the part that I actually have to forgive myself also and love myself enough, it was me not valuing this message that was given to me. And you know, the minute that I started to realize that, and it took me a few years because I've been the runaway bride for for many years now. I first felt the sadness, but then I took that reaction and said, I need to share this, I need to. It doesn't matter what I look like, what I sound like, if I have an accent, if I don't have an accent, if I have hair, no hair, it doesn't matter, you know. I need to share this because this is way too precious for me to hold it in my heart, you know? And so yeah, it is time. I'm ready.
Adrienne MacIain 14:24
And how did this change you?
Ana Levin 15:47
It continues to change me, I think, and this is going to be, for the rest of my life, the work that I do. It really continues to take me to a place of bigger and bigger and bigger understanding of what love is, of our connectivity. Right? interconnectivity. What this experience on planet Earth is about. And it's just, it's humbling, it's honoring and it's humbling, and I'm very grateful. It really has changed me completely as a person. I don't see things the same way. I don't. I appreciate, you know, things that perhaps I overlooked before, even though I'm very observant as a person, and I've always loved nature and animals and children, you know, those are all my weaknesses. But now it's a deeper, it just deepens my view of the world.
Adrienne MacIain 16:55
it's interesting that you call those weaknesses. I would call those strengths.